Becoming a mom
Life now, is absolutely crazy (in a good way). These boys are rough, loud, messy, nasty, and lovable all within a matter of minutes. I would not have it any other way. Even though I hoped and prayed for having sons one day, sometimes I felt conflicted when I prayed because I was afraid of having the stress of having a Black boy who will be a Black man in this world. It is really, really, really terrifying when you hear and see unfortunate news stories that have the same narrative of, “an African American was profiled and thought to be the suspect,” or worse, “an unarmed Black man was killed today.” Now, I understand you can “pray” for safety over your child and not worry about it. If that’s the case, are you telling me Tamir Rice’s, Ryan Twyman’s, Brandon Webber’s, Jemel Roberson’s, Isaiah Lewis’, Trayvon Martin’s, George Floyd’s, Roger Fortson’s, and Tyre Nichols’ mothers never prayed that same prayer over their sons? The list of names could go on forever. Look, I’m not naïve and I am going to do every single thing I can to prepare my boys for what’s to come, to be respectful, to be intelligent, to be strong, but that does not ease my anxiety, not one bit. One thing that does ease my anxiety is my village. They help me navigate through this thing called life while I help raise my boys along with my husband.
It’s nearly impossible to do this alone. Your village is key in raising successful human beings. It is my prayer for whoever is reading this that if you are raising tiny humans, that you have a phenomenal support system! I literally could do not do this mothering thing without my village! It is important to take time for yourself. You cannot be consumed with just being a mom or just being a wife. You have to have some time aside to get a chance to be you! Not “mother” you, not “wife” you, just “you.” That will help you NOT go insane!
Motherhood is only truly successful with your village.
It does get kind of annoying having to constantly pre plan my moves, making sure the boys will be accommodated for, or making sure we have a sitter before plans are made for a date night. Now, do NOT get it twisted, if I could do it over again, I wouldn't trade Janori and Michael,III for anything, not even a "lazy day," that I miss oh so much. All I'm saying is, being a mom is a full time job and it's not for the weak!
Okay, this truth is more of a funny one, kind of, because it ain't that funny to me! So, this is just a little bit of a vent. I was not aware that your belly button does NOT go back into its original place. Yes, I know its different for every woman and blah blah blah, but nobody warned me that this may be a thing!! I was kind of aware of the risk of the belly skin stretching out a tad and being a little looser. Why y'all didn't pre-warn me of this belly button repositioning? I heard about my feet possibly getting bigger (didn't happen), heard about the possibility of not being able to wear high heels anymore (most def didn't happen), and a whole bunch of other stuff that didn't happen. Motherhood not only changes your life, but also changes your body!!!
I really hope you enjoyed my moments of truths!